Unshakable Faith By Becky Akers
(2010-01-11 at 22:37:11 )

Unshakable Faith by Becky Akers

Have you ever seen a bureaucracy beg more tirelessly for abolition than
the Transportation Security Administration? For a month now, its
spectacular ineptitude has hogged headlines, from the agencys posting of
its classified nonsense on the internet to its welcoming the Underwear
Bomber aboard his plane.

You might think the latter especially would result in something a bit
less tepid than the usual calls for reform. After all, the TSA is
supposedly in charge of Protecting the Nations transportation systems to
ensure freedom of movement for people and commerce. Taxpayers footing its
$7-billion annual bill construe that very narrowly: they expect screeners
to find boneheads such as Umar Farouk Abdullmutallab and hustle him off
to jail rather than down the jetway, sans passport. They have not yet
realized that the agency interprets its Mission far more broadly, e.g.,
to ferret out potheads and pornographers, teach serfs who still think
they are citizens their place, forcibly unionize screeners to produce
50,000 Democratic voters, and reward corporations that bribe - sorry,
contribute to politicians with multi-million dollar contracts.

Meanwhile, the TSA does not just fail to detect guys dressed in
explosives. It has been up to its usual antics the last few weeks, even
if its stunt with Umar overshadowed all else. I present the following
incidents solely for their entertainment value: it is unlikely that the
bungling, pathology, and all around nuttiness they highlight will
convince anyone to abolish the TSA if Umar has not.

We go first to Meadows Field Airport near Bakersfield, California, where
A passengers suitcase tested positive for TNT during a routine swabbing
of the bags exterior, Kern County Sheriff Donny Youngblood said. When
Transportation Security Administration officials opened the bag, they
found bottles filled with an amber liquid.

That is honey to those of us who work for a living rather than hiring on
with paranoid Leviathan. Yes, honey. Which sickened two of the TSAs
malingerers: when agents opened one of the bottles and tested the
contents, the resulting fumes nauseated them, Youngblood said. My parents
would have told me to quit pretending, then scolded me that that is what
I get for sticking my nose where it does not belong. Not the TSA: its
busybodies were treated and released at a local hospital while Federal
officials suspended flights Tuesday to and from Bakersfield airport[.
They closed down the airport around 8:20 a.m. and called in a hazardous
material crew. A bomb squad also was dispatched to the airport as a
precaution.

This despite the bags owner, Francisco Ramirez, 31, telling TSA officers
that the bottles were filled with honey, Youngblood said. He added that
it gives every appearance of being honey. Ah, but you know how tricky
sticky stuff is, especially when it lurks in bottles minding their own
business inside a suitcase. I mean, it is not as though poor Ramirez
tried to entice these bozos to sample his sweet. No, they ransacked his
bag and then figured him for a terrorist trying to blow them sky-high.

Mr. Ramizez was detained for questioning but not arrested. Our Rulers
distinguish between these, whatever trouble we subjects have seeing the
difference. Authorities initially questioned his immigration status;
Immigration and Customs Enforcement confirmed - reluctantly, I am sure -
that Ramirez is a legal permanent resident of the U.S. So passengers who
have complied minutely with the TSAs rules -If you need larger amounts of
liquids, gels and aerosol, please place them in your luggage and check
them with your airline - can still count on intimidation and abuse.

Meanwhile, Sheriff Donny -The Pinhead- Youngblood wants to know Why in
this day and age would someone take a chance carrying honey in Gatorade
bottles? That itself is an alarm. It is hard to understand.

Yeah, but Pinhead, everything is hard for you to understand, is it not?

We next head to Philadelphia, where the TSAs canine force has proved as
maladroit as its human one: three security dogs assigned to Philadelphia
International Airport failed recent bomb-sniffing tests. Incompetent
staff is a problem with which the TSA has enormous, endless experience,
so its reaction is honed: the dogs are currently in training, just as
their human counterparts would be -no idiot is ever too stupid to retain
his post at the TSA, while the agency denies any effect on its operation:
We can assure travelers that Philadelphia has ample canine resource to
meet security requirements, says TSA propagandist Ann Davis.

Another pooch bombed out at Minneapolis-St. Paul airport when he
indicated there was something suspicious about a piece of luggage. It is
a toss-up whether Rover or Our Rulers are dumber: the latter called a
bomb squad and cleared parts of the airport for more than an hour though
the suitcase was only a placeholder airline employees put on the luggage
carousel to signal to other employees that all the bags have been
unloaded from a flight.

The TSA grabs any excuse to shut down airports. At Newarks blasphemously
misnamed Liberty International, a man took advantage of a TSA guards
absence to sneak past a security checkpoint Sunday evening and walk arm-
in-arm with a woman into a secure area. He remained for about 20 minutes,
no doubt plotting murder and mayhem while canoodling. A passenger so
bothersome the TSA ought to hire him snitched on Romeo, and yup, the TSA
closed the terminal, Delaying flights across the globe and call[ing into
question just how secure the nations airports really are. Or so the
Associated Press breathlessly editorialized. Actually, only the medias
morons and Our Masters wonder how safe airports are: the rest of us know.

This allowed the TSA to indulge in its usual histrionics: the pettier the
security breach, the more abjectly these buffoons apologize. They have
yet to acknowledge any responsibility for the Underwear Bomber, whose
name does not even appear on their website, but let a guy cozy up to his
gal, and the TSAs heart breaks over its failure to secure aviation: The
surveillance video from Newark Liberty Airport clearly shows that a TSA
officers actions led to the Sunday incident, the agency mourned. We will
use this hard lesson to reinforce the sharp focus and tight discipline -
easy, there, or you will break a rib laughing - at all our stations
across the country and ensure we maintain the public trust.

Psst, scuzzballs: there is no public trust to maintain. Your own blog
testifies to how much passengers hate you.

Then, too, the pettier the breach, the more vengeance the agency wreaks
on those who show it for a fool. Romeo has not been identified or located,
but a TSA spokeswoman said he would face criminal charges if he is found.
Well, heck, that oughta vanquish Al Qaeda.

Astonishing, the unshakeable faith Americans still place in Leviathan.
Despite meaningless but ballyhooed Breaches and Umars Breeches, few folks
- and none of our elected criminals - are demanding even now that we send
the TSA packing. Why disband a totally unconstitutional, completely
incompetent bureaucracy when we can reform it into even greater
unconstitutionality and incompetence?

Our final stop on the security circus is at Los Angeles International.
A TSA agent was arrested on January 3rd in Terminal One. He had just
gotten off duty and was behaving erratically, saying, I Am God, I Am
In Charge!!

Hey, buddy, way too many Americans agree.

January 11, 2010

Becky Akers writes primarily about the American Revolution.

Copyright © 2010 by LewRockwell.com. Permission to reprint in whole or
in part is gladly granted, provided full credit is given.