And Still More Humor From Rokytnji
(2009-03-31 at 13:08:14 )

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out... Forget this
and attaining Enlightenment will be the least of your problems.

Wherever you go, there you are.. Your luggage is another story.

The real trouble with reality is that there is no background music.

Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.

War does not determine who is right. War determines who is left.

A train station is where the train stops. A bus station is where the bus
stops. On my desk, I have a work station.

You can not be late until you show up.

Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like
expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.

Optimism: Waiting for a ship to come in when you have not sent one out.

Books have knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption is a
crime, and crime does not pay; so if you keep reading, you will go broke.

A criminal is a person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient
capital to form a corporation.

A critic is a legless man who teaches running.

For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.

I did not attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

It is hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when
the air was clean and sex was dirty.

I wouldd rather be riding my motorcycle thinking about God than sitting
in church thinking about my motorcycle.

People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it is safer
to harass rich women than to harass motorcycle gangs.

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others cause it whenever they go.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some folks just do not have any film.

I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something
right, there is a 90% probability you will get it wrong.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.

I do not mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, the hour
will be the only thing I have saved all year.

If you want to forget all your other troubles, wear too tight shoes.

If you think nobody cares if you are alive, try missing a couple of your
bill payments.

Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come
back home.

You know you are getting older when the candles cost more than the cake.
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